9 months 9ヶ月

Nano played with toys all over. You can see two teeth in front. そこらじゅうに、おもちゃを散らかして遊ぶナノ。歯が2本、見えてます。

and played with dishes and kitchen tools. She seeks for next game...もっと散らかってるのは、戸棚。次の獲物を狙ってるのか、目つきが悪い、、、
My husband has been out on business since New Year. For three months, I had to take care of Nano by myself and my left hand got worse and worse. I even felt terrible pain to hold the dish. Still I have to hold heavy 9 months 8.5kg Nano and took care of her moving actively. My sister described "raising kid is like Buddhism practive" but I do not think I can end up reaching Spiritual enlightenment. Because of pain, I was irritated to Nano and shouted, "Be good girl, Mammy got so much pain." and soon I felt guilty and talked to her "I know you are doing OK. It is mom's problem" Japanese companies ordered employees to work far from family for a long term, or asked them to work on weekends or til very late night. I think it is based on the system made by old generations who never joined raising kids and thought it was the wives task. But now many of women had jobs and also we had different sense of value. I felt like being forced "raising kids is mother's job and you should manage it!" by a society, but I am not that kind of person. I believe mothers need the person who share not only the raising work but also the feeling, then we can realize cuteness of babies more. I just need 1 hour, or even 30 minutes rest from Nano once a week. 3 week business trip forever is out of question. Well we will have same kind of month on April and I will try to do my best, but I cannot bear more than that. It is bad for Nano, too.
今年になってから、相方の出張が増え、月のうち3週間、家を空けるのが、3ヶ月続いている。ナノカの体重も増え、動きも複雑化し、それを押さえて世話をす るため、私の左手は末期状態の腱鞘炎で、もはや茶碗を持っても痛い。しかし、どんな状態になろうと、抱き上げて、服も着せなければいけないし、お風呂も入 れなければいけない。激痛の中でも、避けられないことばかり。姉が、「子育てって、苦行だよね」と言ってたが、これが修行なのだとしても、未熟な私は悟り が開けるどころか、オムツ替えで暴れるナノカに、痛さのあまり、ついついイラッとしてしまう。「ママは、手が痛いんだよ。いい加減にしてくれ」と大声で 言った後に、反省して、「そりゃあ、ナノカにはわかんないんだろうけどねえ」と付け加えてみたり、、、日本の会社というのは、「子育ては、奥さんに任せて おきなさい」と言わんばかりに、単身赴任させたり、長期出張や休日出勤、残業を容易にさせるが、そのシステム自体、子育てを手伝わなかった時代の男性陣が 作ったままに、残っているとしか思えない。今時の女性は、仕事もしなくてはいけないし、そうじゃなくても、子育てだけに安穏としてられる訳でもなく、(と いうか、昔でも、奥さん達は苦々しく思ってたと思うし)子育ては夫婦の共同作業として、男性の参加も期待されている。(その形は、それぞれだろうが)ナノ カは天使のようにかわいいけれど、いくら母親とはいえ、「かわいいねえ」と一緒に思ってくれる人がいなければ、それも実感できなくなるというものだ。それ に、私だって、たまには30分、1時間でいいから、子供から離れて、本を読んだり、仕事の事を考えたりしたい。やさしいママでもありたいと思う。末期状態 が続くのは、決して、よくない。4月も同様の出張が続くようで、、、ここ1ヶ月を乗り切ったら、普通の生活に戻れるのだと信じたい所だ。


house is full of danger キケン!

Nano now could do so many things including opening the dish shelf and pulled everything out. It is impossible to stop her doing that because it is so much fun and I decided to take breakable dishes away from her reach and let her touch freely.つかまり立ちができるようになって、ナノはますます活動的になった。食器棚も自由に開けて、中を引きずり出すようになったので、手に届く部分から壊れ物を除き、好きなようにさせていた。大事な食器は高い所へ、ガラスのサラダボールは手の届かない戸棚の一番奥に入れて、手前にはタッパーなどの壊れないものを入れる事にした。

But she did beyond my expectation. I heard the sound of breaking something対策はバッチリ、、、のはずだったのだが、目を離してる時に、大きなガチャンという音がして、、、
and I ran to her and found that she could reach the back of the shelf and pulled glass bowls out,,,and broke one a pieces. She nearly touched the broken glasses and I screamed out. 慌てて見に行くと、届かないはずのガラスボールが散乱していて、一枚は割れていた!ひえ〜

I should take her away from dangerous glasses while cleaning. I carried her out from kitchen to ran up the stairs ナノがいちいち手を出してきて、片付けようにも、どうしようもなく危ないので、とりあえず、ナノを2階に連れていき

and left her into the bedroom and shut the door 寝室に閉じ込めると、

and went back to kitchen to clean up the mess in a harry hearing Nano crying upstairs.2階で泣いてるのが聞こえる中、あわてて、片付けた。

rapidly cleaned up and ran to bedroom. She was now quiet holding something. I checked it and found it was small magnet and found another piece in her mouth!!! I asked husband to take away any dangerous things from her reach, but he didn't. It is just so hard to keep Nano from danger. No safe place to release her in our house now. 2階に行くと、ナノは存外静かに、熱心に何かで遊んでいる。よく見ると、相方の小さなマグネットを手に持っていて、なんと一つはすでに口の中に入っていた!(飲み込んでたら、救急車ものだった。ナノの手の届く所から危ないものは撤去するように言っておいたのに!)もはや、家の中に完全な安全な場所はない。あぶない、あぶない。


bag for elementary school girl 女の子のカバン

Nano's cousin will go to the elementary school from this coming April. For her, I made bag to bring some big staff such as art work. It is same shape of my mummy bag. I had wanted very girly staff when I was a child, so I made it very very girly. ナノのいとこのエリカちゃんが、小学校に入学するので、カバンを作った。工作とか、体操着とか、大きなものを持って行く時にでも、使ってもらえたらなあ、と思う。自分が子供の時、女の子っぽい、ピラピラしたものが欲しかった(けど、もらえなかった)ので、思いっきり、かわいらしくしてみた。私のママバックと同じ形にした。

She can use it inside out. To take the photo, I had to hold it, because リバーシブルでも使えるようにした。写真を撮るのに、こうして押さえてないと、

Nano came to take it away,,, ナノが来て、持って行っちゃいます、、、また、ナノの時には、新しいの作ってあげるから、やめてねえ


How to let the baby call the parents なんて子供に呼ばせるか

In Japan, there are several ways of calling the parents. Papa and Mama is now very poplar. I called my parents Otosan and Okasan which was very common in my generations and still for the grownups. There is some nuance difference how to call the parents. Papa&mama is a little sweet and it can be a little too sweet for grown up man call mother in front of people. So probably men will change it when they got older. What shall we call Nano us? 子供に自分達をどう呼ばせるか、は親次第である(思春期になって、勝手に、おふくろ、とか、オヤジ、とか呼び始めるのは、子供次第かもしれないけど)。今は、パパ、ママ、と呼ばせている人が圧倒的に多いようだ。赤ちゃんにも発音しやすい音なので、自然にそうなってしまうのだろう。我が家も、何も考えずに、「パパ」「ママ」で促してるので、そのうち、パパ、ママになるだろう。変更するなら、今のうちかな?
My friend A tried her boy, Kou, to call them, Otochan, Okachan: It is very old fashion and casual way of calling parents. It will be cute and unique since now people don't use often.友人Aの家では、「パパって柄じゃないからなあ」と旦那が言って、「お父ちゃん、お母ちゃん」と呼ばせる事に決めた。今時珍しいから、かわいくて、いいかも!

Kou was a little slow to talk(boy is a little slower than girls) and even after he started to say some words such as elephant, he still could not say, "Otochan" "Okachan". He even called grandpa's name.男の子だったのもあって、言葉がゆっくりめだったコウくん。1歳半を過ぎ、いろいろ言葉が始まり、「ゾウさん」から「トッキイ」(おじいちゃんの名前)まで言えるようになったのだが、まだ親を呼ぶ事ができない。

A could not be patient and changed her mind and let Kou call her Mama. He easily called Mama. Daddy didn't want himself call Papa, so kept his first decision, then he did not call daddy yet. hahaha たまりかねたAは、「もういいや、ママだ、ママだよ」と、ママと呼ばせた所、あっさり、「ママ〜」と呼ぶようになった。しかし、「お父ちゃんや」とこだわった旦那は、結局、呼んでもらえなかったそうだ。(ちなみに、現在は、「かーちゃ」「とーしゃ」と父ちゃん、母ちゃん、路線に戻って,呼んでもらえてるそうです)

Husband called himself "Papa" before Nano's birth without any thinking. All my surroundings called me "Mama" after Nano's birth. Now Nano pronounce Ma and soon she will call us mama and papa.私達はと言えば、相方は、ナノが生まれる前から自分を「パパ」と呼び、まわりは、ナノが生まれた途端、私を「ママ」と呼び出した。ナノは「マ」の発音ができるようになったようだし、「ママ」「パパ」と呼び出すのも時間の問題だろう。
Should I let her call me, Maman? It is easy to pronounce and unique here. いっそのこと、「ママン」にしちゃおうかな。


mishearing 空耳アワーナノちゃん

Nano makes many different sounds. I guess she is practicing to make sounds for speaking in the future. Sometimes what she said sounded like words and I felt like she is speaking. ナノは口から、いろいろな音を出す。多分、喋る練習をしているのだろうが、その時だす音が、喋っているように聞こえる事が、ままある。

One time, she said "Oto-chan" meaning daddy in Japanese in very casual and old fashion way. ある時、「おたうちゃん」とよく発音するようになった。お父ちゃんと言ったのか?

On the other time, she said, "Haha-ue" meaning Mother in classic noble way. すると別の時には、「ああうえ」と言うようになった。「母上」?

I said, "Nano called me "hahaue" and you "oto-chan." There is huge gap between us in hierarchy." お父ちゃんと、母上。「ちょっと、私達の間には、身分差があるみたいだよ」と言うと、相方は、「うーん」と不満そうだった。


First Berry はじめてのイチゴちゃん

To live with newborn is to observe the very first experiences. Today I bought strawberry and gave one to her. She liked the color first and loved the taste after that. Her dress got dirty by drips of berry. She spent 5 minutes to taste one and still half of the berry remained. It was informing of coming of spring.


A day before March 11, there was TV program about 3/11 earthquake and tsunami disasters and I watched it after Nano fell asleep. Now we went back daily life before disasters(it is important, I think) and I started to forget how hard what people experienced. The program showed some people who lost families, some people who saved others and helped each other to survive. It reminded me important things: how much I already had and how lucky I could spend the ordinary days with family. I was ashamed about myself complaining luck of many things. I thanked to husband whom I could trust to be with me and Nanoka if we were in the incidents.
On March 11, Nanoka and I joined the candle night nearby. Through a year, I could do almost nothing since I was pregnant at that time and I was busy taking care of tiny Nanoka after that.


Ma マ

Nano can pronounce "Ba" easiest. So she made conversation only with "Ba." Baba means Grandma in baby word in Japanese, so my mom was happy to answer her. ナノは「バ」が一番発音しやすいようだ。なので、彼女の会話はすべて、バ(とパ)で形成されている。当然、ばばは、呼ばれた気分がして、うれしそうだ。

One day, Nano finally pronounced "Ma." She needed concentration and her body muscular were in tention. I was moved. パ、が先で、なかなか発音できなかった「マ」を、最近になり発音できるようになった。ちょっと、力が入っちゃうようだ。

Even once she pronounced, she was not using everyday. Still she talked to me, "Ba" "Pa" and husband doubted if Nano really said "Ma". 発音できるんだから、これからは呼んでくれると思ったのだが、相変わらず、「バ」「パ」で会話をしてくる。促しても、全然、マとは言わない。相方にも、「本当に言ったの〜?」と怪しまれる始末。あれは、偶然だったのか?

I gave up asking Nano to say "Ma." Maybe she was just accidentally saying it. But in the night or when she was sleepy or hungry or got hurt somewhere, she came to me saying "Ma" upset or crying. She can say it, but keeps it only when she really needs help... でも、眠くなって、抱っこして欲しいとか、甘えたくて、おっぱい飲みたいとか、思い通りにならなくて腹を立ててる時とかに、泣きながら、あるいは、怒りながら、「マ〜」と寄ってくる。発音が難しいのか、切羽詰まって、欲求が高い時にしか、言わないみたいだ。


No! ダメ!

We said "No" to tell Nano to stop the dangerous action such as playing with the plugs. ナノが一人でいろいろしでかすようになったので、危険な事をやめさせる時には、「No」と言うことにした。

She might understand that we were trying to stop, but it was not serious for her. She giggled when she was said "No" 多分、止められてる事はわかってるのだが、私が「No」と言うと、にやっと笑って、やめないナノ。なめられてるようだ、、、

Yesterday I found Nano biting waste of coffee filtered paper in the kitchen. I said, "Oh my god!" loudly. ところが、昨日、キッチンでコーヒーのかすをゴミ箱から出して、ほおばっているナノカを見つけて、「うわ〜」と叫んだら、

I did not scald her at all (I think I had never except saying no when I found dangerous as above), but she burst to cry with dirt of coffee waste. It was huge mess. Mommy wanted to cry...火がついたみたいに、泣き出した。しかった訳じゃないのに、なんで泣くんだ?(というか、Noは言っても、しかられた事すらないのに)泣きたいのはママなんだけどなあ〜
There are several ways of thinking about how to educate the kids. Some books said that we should not stop them at all and we should not say "No" at any time. In other books they said that the kids needs instruction. It is really confusing for parents to follow which way. In Japan it is big stream that no "No" education recently and I saw many mothers and fathers believed it. We do not know what is right or not, but we think, no "No" is a little difficult. When we go out, visit friends, or at the store, kids have to follow the rules there, and we cannot control baby if we did no "No" education every day. We started to stop her only when it is dangerous since Nano is still small and hard to be educated. But what is dangerous is up to person and husband and I had different idea some times.


first hina festival 初節句

With hina princess and odairi prince dolls of her. 実家滞在中だったので、実家の玄関に飾らせてもらいました。

There are her dolls. 小ぶりだけど、やさしくて、かわいらしいお顔のおひな様です。
Hinamatsuri is the Japanese traditional festival on March 3rd. It is special day only for girls. The parents are decorating dolls wishing the girl's healthy happy life and good marriage(Already!?) in the future. We had Nano's first one and tried to find suitable dolls. I did not want huge expensive set of dolls, but I wanted something special for her since it is my favorite festival. Looking at the several shops and sites, I found one women doll artist named Kikue. The doll's face look like Nano and I felt in love with the dolls. It was still expensive for us, even only princess and prince two dolls. We talked, talked and decided to buy one and drove one day trip on one Sunday.We were satisfied our hina dolls and wish having happy hina festivals for long.